Bad timing

LB was really clingy last night. She did NOT want to lie down in her bed. I swear when I gave her the over-the-crib hug, she did not let go until I felt her grip release because she was slowly passing out. Awww. Poor bubbo.

I was also awakened by her random high pitched cries throughout the night. Luckily, she's been able to go back to sleep on her own, but it still shakes me to hear her. I think she knows that we're moving again, plus the weekend with daddy totally messed with her daily routine.

So by 5 am, I was completely resistant to getting up. I DID manage to lurch to my feet at about 5:30, and pissily shove the workout dvd in the player. Called JL, check. My workout was pretty half-assed I must say, I was so NOT perky this morning.

To top it off, I bit my tongue last night, which has developed into a huge achy spot. There is definitely some pain when I talk, and to make it worse, I either sound like I have a lisp or I just came back from having my teeth drilled.

The cherry on TOP of this situation is that today I have my "Psychological Evaluation" over the phone with a therapist in California....for my egg donation. So she will either be unable to understand me or I will have to stop talking every two minutes to swallow drool and cringe in pain.

So, I may still be rejected, due to disfunctional tongue syndrome. Wish me luck :)

Bad Dreams

I had my first experience with a "Death of your Child" dream. I had the usual weird pregnancy dreams when I was knocked up, the most interesting being the one where I dreamed I had LB and she came out a boy, then almost instantly transformed into a girl. Funny cause all along the Ultrasounds kept telling us she was a boy, and she popped out a girl...hmmm?

This dream was different though. I dreamed I was in the middle of a very muddy pond, like the ones we used to catch salamanders in as kids in Vermont. I was on a ship which was almost as big as the pond. As if it were cut from the movie Titanic, the ship RIPS in half and sinks. The weird thing about it was that the pond was so shallow, the top of the thing was sticking out of the water. LB gets stuck under the boat somehow and drowns.

I can remember partially waking up at this point and sobbing, and falling back to sleep. I think I was in that "half awake/half asleep" state, because my dream continued. This was the weird part: One of my friend's twins was sitting on the bank of the pond, covered in dirt. In the dream, I pick her up as if she was my own and take her away, the whole time people telling me "Its ok, at least you still have the other one."

Can we say FULL MOON? What is your perspective on dreams?