What it means to be an Assistant

I'm bloging from Planet Stuffy Head. Seriously, I am hearing things as if I'm chillin' at the bottom of the bathtub. Like Charlie Brown hears the grown-ups talking in those cartoon movies we used to watch. WA WA WA WAH.

Driving down from 7000 ft this morning, my head could be compared to a balloon slowly inflating. I'm sure the other drivers were staring at me, my mouth wide open, trying to yawn the corks out of my ears. It's now 9:40 am and I still feel like I'm in a tunnel.

I am also in Administrative Limbo. Having sent out 20 something emails, calls and faxes, I'm almost in panic mode at the lack of response. I need a Spanish Translator by 10:00 am tomorrow. Living in Southwest Colorado, you wouldn't think this would be such a difficult task. Yet my phone is silent, my email empty, the fax asleep.

Do I step it up and become annoying phone call girl? Do I slink into the shadows with my tail between my legs? At this point, any call I receive will be filtered through 8 layers of cotton in my ears, and responded to in muffled grunting, in between sneezes.

I was just informed by my boss that if I don't find someone to assist this very legally sensitive matter, well...there IS no other alternative, lets just say that. WORK, YOU PEON! DO YOUR JOB! Get those fingers BUSY Little Miss Secretary! Get out there and hustle SWEETIE!

I speak broken spanish at best. Yo no tengo la palabras necessitas para este situacion. AYE CARAMBA. DIOS MIO. Ayuda ME!



*Head continues to inflate*

Ok so maybe it wasn't the cottage cheese

I spent almost all of Friday night yarfing, so I'm thinking there might have been a bug crawling around LB's daycare after all. It took me all Saturday to regain my strength, which sort of sent me into a mini-panic about my move in 11 days.

I came to this conclusion:

I can NEVER get sick. I can NEVER get hurt. I can NEVER do anything that will result in me passing out/being incapacitated in any way.

Why? Because I will be the only one there. Who will be able to watch LB, if I'm bowing down to the toilet all day or night? What will happen to her if I fall down the stairs and break my neck? What if I choke on a ham sandwich, who will be there to give me the Heimlich? No one.

As much as I am ready to get the hell out of my mother's house, I must admit she is currently my safety blanket in case of emergency. If I hadn't gotten a full day worth of rest on Saturday, I don't know if I would have made it into to work today. If my mom hadn't been there to watch LB, I would probably have lost an 8 hr workday so I could power-up for the rest of the week.

Don't get me wrong. I am a competent and strong single mama. I know I can handle taking care of my child while running my own apartment. I just really need to step it up and take care of myself better (Which I think I have a head start on with the workout tree). I need to start taking vitamins, eating healthier and cut back on the wine drinkage. I know this won't guarantee my perfect health, but it will make this soon-to-be dark, dark winter season, a little less scary.

The scale said 153.4 this morning! I guess the pukefest took its toll on mi cuerpo pretty good :(